Friday, September 25, 2009

Cool Definations


School:
A place where Papa pays and Son plays. 

Life Insurance:

A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich. 

Nurse:

A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills. 

Marriage:

It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.

Tears:

The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower. 

Lecture:
An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through 'the minds of either' 

Conference:
The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present. 

Compromise:
The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece. 

Dictionary:
A place where success comes before work. 

Conference Room:
A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on. 

Father:
A banker provided by nature. 

Boss:
Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early. 

Politician:
One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after. 

Doctor:

A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.

Classic:

Books, which people praise, but do not read. 

Smile:
A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

Office:

A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life..

Yawn:

The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth. 

Etc.:

A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do. 

Committee:
Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together. 

Experience:
The name men give to their mistakes. 

Atom Bomb:

An invention to end all inventions. 

Philosopher:

A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise after death